perhaps in the ground

the detritus of him remain swimming in my thoughts. the surface tells not of the chaos within. walking down the street, a random thought surfaces; stomach lurching i remember him. to live in anticipation yet fear of time; know not how the end will arrive. perhaps with fanfare; perhaps with quiet determination; perhaps replaced.

how do you love someone? quietly, constantly, softly. no matter the other. but for that you suffer, with your insides turned out, with your heart on your sleeve, hoping to be caught. call it stupidity, for by any other name it would feel as stark, as sweet, as intense. at odds, my head and my heart cannot agree – to love or to leave. perhaps the prophecy will fulfill itself to my utter detriment, the silly thoughts planted by years of tragic lovers of centuries past. rapier word, thy blade is fine; lays cold in my bosom, warmed by the blood that flows freely.

fie! fie! i will not die in the courtyard, in the cold. perhaps in the ground.

~ by mavj on September 21, 2009.